MikesterMike's Mind

Sometimes funny, sometimes thought-provoking, always full of B.S.

Olympic review and more

25th-Aug-2008 12:24 pm

A few thoughts about the Olympics, my life, and other random things.

Olympics – I watched a lot of the events, even staying up until 4 in the morning watching the USA-Spain basketball final. I, of course, enjoyed watching the USA do well. I must say that some USA athletes, especially those in Track and Field, are arrogant son-of-a-bitches. Just a few notable ones, I guess. The other USA athletes were cute, humble, and just pleased as hell to be there. Of course, those folks are the ones who did well, sorta.

Every news outlet has listed the winners and losers of the games. I think this is a good way to reflect on the highs and lows of the last few weeks. So, here it is, my two cents (buck fifty in Canada)

USA Winners:

Michael Phelps – This guy is now a household name. When he did some pretty amazing stuff last Olympics, the spotlight was on him this time around, and he freaking delivered! Now, what to do for an encore? Just stay healthy, please. Oh, and Spitz could NOT take you. Ever.
Jason Lezak – OMFG, did he ever pull a rabbit out of a hat during the 4x100. Jeebus. It is said that performing around superior people will elevate your own work. Very true in Lezak’s case. Thank you, thank you, thank you for allowing me and my family to scream like crazy at the television. The memory will never dim.
Dara Torres – What a classy, classy woman. .01 from being immortalized in history. Hope to see you in London, girl.
Shawn Johnson – You have become the new pinup girl for thousands of teen boys and loli lovers. Don’t blow it. We want to see you in London.
USA swimming – What strength! Just gotta improve in a few events, and we’ll have total domination. Let’s never again have finals without Americans, ok?
Men’s gymnastics – Did anyone tell you guys you weren’t supposed to medal? And almost getting a silver with backups of backups. Nice job.
Volleyball – Men’s, women’s, indoor, beach, it didn’t matter: You guys rock. 3 gold, 1 silver is a helluva haul. And hooray to wet white see-through spandex outfits in the beach women’s final. Fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap…
Men’s basketball – WOW, what a finish. It was worth staying up late. Close games are a ton more exciting than blowouts. Good job, guys.
Stephanie Brown Trafton – Who is this, you ask? The women’s discus winner, that’s who! Big girls need loving, too, and I am a fan. Thank you for being the highlight of traditional Olympic sport.
Bryan Clay – Never has there been so little fanfare for the decathlete. Thank you for being humble, sir. You are truly a giant among men, and much success in the future.
Women’s fencers – Especially the individual saber folks, way to get us on the board. I just LOVE hearing a woman scream when on the offensive. Sexy for such a violent and snobby sport.
Rebecca Soni – Hot, fast, and scored two silvers and a gold in swimming. Please, please, please pose for Playboy, too. (Just don’t fail at swimming like Beard did after the shoot). It’s nice to see that a “nobody” can smack around world records, too.

USA Losers:

Alicia Sacramone – Um, just because you are legal and good looking shouldn’t make you a star. You are a walking joke; a choke artist who should hide out for a while. Expect your skin to turn blue, because that’s a symptom of silver poisoning. Way to drag everyone else down, girl. You are better than that.
USA track and field – Uugggghhhhh. You guys suck, collectively, except for a noted few, and I do mean a few. The suckiest are the runners, who are full of choke. Someone slap these fools around. Is Jerry Colangelo available to run this program? I have never seen any more direct example of the “Arrogant American” than the runners, men’s and women’s. Grrrr.. Where are the high jumpers? Where are the hammer throwers? Where are the medals in anything outside of team running?
Nastia Liukin – Um, what pray tell is she doing on this list? Didn’t she excel? Didn’t she win? Well, yes, but she also disappeared afterwards. We could always see Shawn Johnson around, but she seemed to vanish after the event. It’s a minor loss, but we want to see our winners. The exhibition event with her and the balance beam was sexy, but we need to see her in street clothes. And your dad is waaay too serious. And on-the-lips-kissing your dad is weird.
Women’s gymnastics – You guys got served, buy a bunch of 14 year olds nonetheless. Epic fail.
Women’s softball – Oh, jeebus. What happened? All this domination to be handed a low scoring loss by a pitcher who pitched a whole game the day before. Either the competition before was really bad, or you guys chocked the worst of all.
Katie Hoff – Weren’t you supposed to win a bunch of events, too? Overhyped Hoff.
Bernard Lagat – Um, welcome to the US, next stop: Chokesville. You can head back to Kenya now…

Other winners:

Chinese Olympians – Could they have had a better Olympics? I think not. 9 short of their goal of 119 medals, they did extremely well. A little too well in some areas.
Matthew Mitcham – Australian Matthew is the men’s 10m platform gold medalist. He dived out of his mind, and hosed the Chinese sweep of diving events. Way to go, dude.
Roberto Cammarelle – He is the Italian gold medalist in the super heavyweight divison in boxing. He trounced the Chinese entrant, not letting the poor scoring that was evident in the venues affect him. He won by clocking the Chinese fighter with a left uppercut, which caused the Chinese to fall. It was be-uuuu-tiful.
NBC – With the opportunity to have much fail, NBC did alright. It could have been worse. Very little fluff, lots of games. Some notable FAIl, though, as noted below.
Usain Bolt – Dayamn, this dude is fast. I always thought a long-legged guy would have an advantage. A quick long stride will beat Speedy Gonzales anyday. Dude, enjoy the celebrity, just don’t get cocky or lose your touch.

Other losers:

Chinese people – Um, you guys are fucked. The Olympics just showed that the government is in control. I cringed seeing Chairman Mao’s portrait staring at the marathoners running by. I would have flipped him off if I were an athlete.
International Olympic Committee (IOC) – The IOC did nothing to help freedoms in China, in fact, turned a blind eye to all forms of abuses and even cheating by the Chinese. And the reasons for dropping baseball and softball? The most bullshit reasons ever. If curling, ping-pong, BMX, and equestrian are Olympic events, baseball should be as well. FAIL.
London– What the fuck was that? The closing ceremonies had you guys dressed up as extras in “Oliver!” and dancing around Optimus Prime Minister, having faux-sex with your brollies. It made no sense. And that horrid duo on top? WTF, I say, WTF??
Boxing – I never have seen such bias in scoring, ever. I watched one boxer land a punch so hard it stood the other guy up, yet there was no score for it. Oh wait, the other guy was Chinese. Nevermind.
Taekwando – You know it as another event full of bad scoring. The IOC needs to get less biased judges.
Jacques Rogge – This IOC president is the epitome of European elitism. It’s hard to see the world from way atop your ivory tower when your head is that far up your ass, sir. As close to a soulless entity without being a mass murderer or Communist Party member as you can get. Can lie with a face straighter than a room full of Republicans.
BMX, equestrian, and mountain bicycling – Why the FUCK are these events? I would rather watch rhythm gymnastics (another fail event) instead of these 3. Get rid of em and get karate, baseball and softball.
NBC – Ok, I gave em a pass for being decent on coverage, but AMERICANS want to watch AMERICANS compete, not Chinese, you fucks. And, it’s ok to say something about Tibet. In fact, we expected it. Challenge everything.
Mary Carillo – Oh, jesus, someone please put this bull dyke to pasture. She is the worst commentator that NBC had. She said some of the most asinine things. For someone known to forgo a script, she really said her mind: MORON.
Georgia– If it weren’t for the Olympics, you guys might have gotten some help instead of pity.
Chinese female gymnasts – Even if you are 16, because your government is so evil, you’ll never get the benefit of the doubt. Might as well put an asterisk next to your gold medals, girls. But, we know, you ain’t 16. At least not all of you. Enjoy cheating. Enjoy the feel of tainted gold. It won’t happen again. Cheating fucks.
USA boxing – Did we have anyone show up? Don’t make ME get my gloves back on.
Serdamba Purevdorj – In men’s light fly weight boxing, this guy bows out of the gold medal fight, saying he had an injured shoulder. I have watched enough events to know a thrown fight when I see one. He was fighting a Chinese guy, and he’s from Mongolia (a Chinese bitch state). Dollar to donuts he was paid well to throw the final fight, because gold medals don’t pay the bills. Or he was threatened. Either way, the mofo took a dive. He is the ultimate loser.

Overall, it was fun. I look forward to a non-biased Olympic venue in the UK. I don’t expect the Chinese to do as well, at least not tin the gold medal category, because no one will be kissing your commie asses. I want to attend the London games, so anyone want to go, let me know. I wanna party!

I read about a guy who can’t get any work. He has a degree in Interdisciplinary Studies. He can’t lift anything over 30 lbs because of numerous hernias. He is huge and fat and has a hard time walking. He was let go from his last job for excessive absenteeism. Would YOU hire him? He can’t understand why he never gets a second interview. I can, can you?

I am hard on him because he is married to someone I used to care for dearly. He has ruined her life. I am a big guy, and I have had to work the hard labor jobs to work my way into something cushier. I went to school at night while working 20-30 hours overtime a week. I busted my ass. I can barely bend my knees anymore, and at 35, that’s not good. My fingers are perpetually swollen, and my blood pressure, blood sugar, and general and mental health are all out of whack. I just got it done, though. This choad just whines a lot. His unemployment doesn’t stop him from leaching off his parents or brewing beer in the meantime. He bitches about having to work at Home Depot. He sucks. Nut up, suffer some, and start providing, or she’ll leave you (no, she won’t, but I can dream). I know it is kicking a man when he is down when I rant like this. I just hope that the challenge from my awful and hurtful vibes gets to him and he does what is right. I dunno. Maybe I am just a mean MF and shouldn’t say such things.

Since Chel isn’t working, and I have no more OT is this job, we’re down to just getting by again in our lives. We had to sell our boat and forgo all the fun stuff to be homebodies. This sacrifice is for my boy, but I just wish I could get that OT back or move into a higher paying gig. I am having to pay off my student loans, and that is what is eating up the monies. Otherwise, we’d be fine. No car payments, no deep credit cards. Just the student loans, utilities, gas, food, a home improvement loan (air conditioning repair and new patio door), and that’s it. Grrr. So, I am looking for a part time or weekend only gig to do to pay for the loan. I am looking more so now as the college kids went off to college.

OK, l8rs-

Tags:alicia sacramone, basketball, bernard lagat, bmx, boxing, broke, bryan clay, china, chinese, dara torres, equestrian, fencing, georgia, gymnastics, ioc, jacques rogge, jason lezak, katie hoff, london, mary carillo, matthew mitcham, michael phelps, mountain biking, nastia liukin, nbc, olympics, ot, rebecca soni, roberto cammarelle, sabre, serdamba purevdorj, shawn johnson, softball, stephanie brown trafton, student loan, taekwando, track and field, usa swimming, usian bolt, volleyball
Location:The Ranch
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Music:Tommy Conwell & The Young Rumblers

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